The Dark Lights

Upon entering this world I opened my eyes and got hit by the blinding worldly lights. I curiously looked at those eccentric lights around me and cried. I cried because I knew the intent of those lights was to make me blind. They seemed like an elixir of some magical flecks that got me captivated. I looked at them for so long with the creasing edges along my watered eyes to familiarize my vision with those sadly captivating lights. The long stare at those lights made me realize that they had already submerged me into an inescapable misery of the life I was not prepared to live. While I was comprehending them, I saw people smiling at my tiny existence, holding me as if I was a water bubble waiting to pop up with one wrong movement. I heard them telling my mom and dad that I was the most beautiful newborn they had ever seen. They caressed my fresh, sleek, side parted hair, leaving gentle kisses on my head and cheeks. I saw them flashing lightning smiles at me. Lights again, I pondered. I saw lights in their superficial smiles but there was a dark murky gloom behind them. I watched them as they hopelessly tried to hide the darkness inside them with their smiles. It scared me. At that time I wanted to hush them and tell my parents not to believe a word they were saying. I tried to close my eyes to cease that insincere moment but the worldly light was so enchanting that I kept on staring at it with my eyes wide open, and started crying once again at my helplessness. Not being able to see his crying baby, my father held me and rocked me in his arms, giving me delicate kisses on my forehead while mother tenderly sang a lullaby in my ears to put my restless body at ease. That, I believe, was the very first moment when I couldn't bring them down so I stopped crying, lay down all my defenses, and let us all tread on the deceptively illuminated path. 

As I grew up, I started taking a great pleasure in sitting under the night skies. I enjoyed watching the twinkling stars spreading magic in the sky. They always looked so wonderful to my eyes but deep down I knew it's the darkness of the sky that made the stars show off their glistening lights. The sparkling skies always took me to an illuminated, enchanted journey but as the darkness behind those stars was replaced with light at the crack of dawn, the magical show of stars would disappear. At first I tried madly to find the disappeared stars in the sky but with time I realized that it is not for me but the inky black sky to bring back the magical show of those twinkling stars.

I've also found lights in eyes other than mine, capturing my attention, and daring me to venture on the scariest journeys of my life. The gleaming eyes emitting illuminated tenderness and radiance made me feel that nothing could be truer than this glow. But I was wrong. The light had deceived me once again. Light has always deceived me and even then I have always followed it. Since birth, I was aware of its inherently strange nature. It has been surrounding me for as long as I've been awake now. I've made it my pathfinder for the longest time. It has even followed me in my dreams. There's been a lot of light in my life. I have always chosen the worldly lights to guide me to a truer territory but while doing so, I have always been tricked. I have always put so much faith in these lights but, mysteriously, these lights have always led me into the dark.